Resources for “coming out” as trans to Spanish-only speaking parents
A question I received and responded to in private. Making this rebloggable so that folks can see what my response is but more importantly for trans* Latin@s to share the resources they find useful.
hi! yes there are some publications that may be useful. PFLAG has two in Spanish that may be useful one called Si Tu Mismo (link opens to PDF) and Nuestros hijas y hijos preguntas y respuestas para padres de gays, lesbianas, y bisexuales (although only focusing on LGB the language may be useful) and Welcoming our trans family is also a resource but in english.
The Trevor Project has an online chat and one is MONDAY today which may be useful
TransYouth Family Allies (TYFA) have resources in Spanish that may be useful. One on vocabulary, FAQ, and counseling.
The Sylvia Rivera Law Project website is in Spanish.
REDLACTRANS (Latin American and Caribbean Transgender Network) has information by country of origin.
Advocates for Youth also produced this booklet called ‘I think I might be transgender… now what do I do?’ which is available in a few languages, including Spanish.
This is a boa constrictor, it’s a snake (duh). The way it kills it’s prey is by wrapping itself around it and then squeezing tighter when the victim breathes out. A Boa and an Ace bandage have that in common… An ace bandage is designed to apply pressure to a twisted ankle or wrist. Much like a snake, its function is to hold a body part as tightly as it can and when this method is used in binding, the results can be very dangerous. While it’s elasticity and cheap price may be appealing for those in need of a binder, there is no healthy and safe way to bind using an ace bandage.
Duct tape is another resource many Transguys turn to. This is also very dangerous. In order to get duct tape to produce the desired ‘flat’ appearance, it would have to be extremely tight. When your lungs can’t naturally fill to a normal capacity your body is receiving less oxygen than it should and long term could cause minor brain damage and fatigue. Reoccurring binding sessions can even leave you bruised.
Showing images of ftms using ace bandages to bind has become an iconic form of gender expression. While using it in art to represent binding may occur all over the interwebs, this is NOT a safe way to bind and alternative methods should be used when possible.
Please check out some of our website articles on the topic:boost
Binding Tip #2.
If you have to wear your binder for long periods of time (like if you work a really long day, or live in a flat or house where you have to bind all day), use padding under the shoulder straps to relieve some of the tightness and pressure. Even the old shoulder pads from “granny shirts” work as great padding for this.
whoa!!!!!!
signal boost!!
The article is talking about a new
Reblogging for interested followers.
—BB
This is a somewhat controversial stance, but to me queer means something completely different than “gay” or “lesbian” or “bisexual.” A queer person is usually someone who has come to a non-binary view of gender, who recognizes the validity of all trans identities, and who, given this understanding of infinite gender possibilities, finds it hard to define their sexuality any longer in a gender-based way. Queer people understand and support non-monogamy even if they do not engage in it themselves. They can grok being asexual or aromantic. (What does sex have to do with love, or love with sex, necessarily?) A queer can view promiscuous (protected) public bathhouse sex with strangers and complete abstinence as equally healthy.
Queers understand that people have different relationships to their bodies. We get what it means to be stone. We know what body dysphoria is about. We understand that not everyone likes to get touched the same way or to get touched at all. We realize that people with disabilities may have different sexual needs, and that people with survivor histories often have sexual triggers. We can negotiate safe and creative ways to be intimate with people with HIV/AIDs and other STIs.
Queers understand the range of power and sensation and the diversity of sexual dynamics. We are tops and bottoms, doms and subs, sadists and masochists and sadomasochists, versatiles and switches. We know what we like and don’t like in bed.
We embrace a wide range of relationship types. We can be partners, lovers, friends with benefits, platonic sweethearts, chosen family. We can have very different dynamics with different people, often all at once. We don’t expect one person to be able to fulfill all our diverse needs, fantasies and ideals indefinitely.
Because our views on relationships, sex, gender, love, bodies, and family are so unconventional, we are of necessity anti-assimilationist. Because under the kyriarchy we suffer, and watch the people we love suffering, we are political. Because we want to survive, we fight. We only want the freedom to be ourselves, love ourselves, love each other, and live together. Because we are routinely denied that, we are pissed.
Queer doesn’t mean “don’t label me,” it means “I am naming myself.” It means “ask me more questions if you curious” and in the same breath means “fuck off.
here are some basic rules for flirting:
- Are you in a car? No don’t do it
- Are you across the street from them and don’t feel like crossing the street? No.
- Basically if you’re yelling to do it, don’t do it.
- Do they look really busy with something and is it something you can help them with? approach with caution
- Do they look really busy with something and it’s not something you can help them with? Don’t bother them
- When you talk to them are they avoiding eye contact, pointedly looking for an escape route, replying in short replies, and using body language like leaning away or crossing the arms? Go away.
- Are they in an enclosed space where the literally cannot get away from you? Don’t do it.
- Never touch them unless you know them well and you ask first.
- If they say they need to leave or you need to leave let them do it and don’t complain.
If you see someone who is displaying the body language like number 6, go help them out by distracting the person trying to talk to them. They will probably be super grateful.
Have more rules to add to the list? Let me know!
I posted last week asking people if they knew of some good resources for male victims of sexual assault. Here is the list people came up with:
http://finallyfeminism101.wordpress.com/
Thanks everyone!
reblog for signal boost
Sex is not a big deal, sex is actually a really really everyday activity. It’s still lovely, but it’s (for me at least) as natural as having a cup of tea, and yeah sure you have stuff to learn at first, but it’s still not a big deal. Like learning to drive is a way bigger deal than learning to be good in bed, because being bad in bed probably won’t kill you or anyone else (car accidents on the other hand can cause fatalities).
It’s a lot more like learning to cook, cooking is awesome, good food enhances your life and is pretty damned awesome, and when you’re first learning, sure you might undercook the chicken a time or two, or make something that tastes awful, but ultimately, nobody dies and it’s not a big deal.
Also picking the “right” person isn’t a big deal, pick someone trust worthy who you feel safe with and are turned on by, really that’s it. It doesn’t have to be true love or anything, just like the first thing you learn to cook doesn’t have to be your favorite food.
I like this analogy! And if I may take it and run with it a bit:
There’s no set age on how old you have to be to be allowed to use the stove, but generally there’s a consensus that you shouldn’t use the stove until you’re old enough to know how to not burn yourself and how to handle it if pots overflow or the burner starts smoking a bit. But that doesn’t mean that until you’re old enough to use the stove, you can’t learn how to cook at all. You can still teach kids basic cooking concepts like stirring and smashing graham crackers without letting them use the stove on their own, which is good because when they do use the stove, they’ll have a better idea of cooking than someone who’s only ever seen chefs in movies and on television and then thinks that’s all they need to do to be able to cook well.
And not everyone likes to cook! And that’s OK!
And some people like spicy food and some people like comfort food and that’s OK because we don’t say that people are horrible and awful for liking curries, jeez.
And some people like cooking food for a lot of people, while other people like to just have one person to cook for.
Seriously, food analogies for sex are the fucking best.
—BB
When I first started having sex with other people, I used to like to count them. I wanted to keep track of how many there had been. It was a source of some kind of pride, or identity anyway, to know how many people I’d had sex with in my lifetime. So, in my mind, Len was number one, Chris was number two, that slimy, awful, little heavy metal barbiturate addict whose name I can’t remember was number three, Alan was number four and so on. It got to the point where, when I’d start having sex with a new person for the first time, when his cock first entered me (I was only having sex with men at the time), what would flash through my head wouldn’t be “Oh baby, baby your cock feels so good,” or “What the hell am I doing with this creep?” or “This is boring, I wonder what’s on TV.” What flashed through my head was: “Seven!”
This is a very interesting article that I found helpful for several reasons. Dealing with positions especially. Go ahead and read it!
or here’ the url:
http://persephonemagazine.com/2012/03/01/fat-sex-what-everyone-wants-to-know-but-is-afraid-to-ask/
